Doesn't that sound so cliche? Recently, I've seen so many dumb pickets that say something similar to this. But today, when I say it, I am fully serious.
I am... 1%.
Trust me, I wish I was the 99%.
1 in 100 women will experience recurrent miscarriages (I've also seen this dubbed "habitual aborter", what the HECK! isn't that a rockin' way to define such a miserable diagnosis?!) This is defined as 2-3 miscarriages in a row. There is sometimes a bit of a grey area with the 2. A lot of doctors want to see 3 in a row before they do testing. My case was a bit confusing, so we didn't do testing after the second miscarriage because they seemed to be two separate fluke events with completely different circumstances. Well, hindsight...
On New Year's Day, we were out of town celebrating our fifth wedding anniversary, we woke up to find we were expecting. Yes, again. I just knew this couldn't happen three times in a row. Well, it doesn't matter what I think. Que sera, sera. I thought I knew it couldn't happen twice in a row, and it did.
As of today, it's official. Three in a row. In every study, case, whatever... 3 is the bottom line. And I am there. In only 50% of that 1% will an underlying cause even be found. And to answer your question, yes, we will be doing testing. My case is kind of confusing, though, because we have Jake. He was my first pregnancy. It was completely perfect. Aside from having to take medicine to GET pregnant, the pregnancy could not have been a more perfect one. So why then? Why would you have one perfectly normal, healthy pregnancy and child, then not be able to complete 3 pregnancies, back-to-back??
So let it go on record. THREE miscarriages in ONE calendar year.
That's right.
I just so desperately want Jake to have a sibling.
I want a big family.
But for now I will love on the little family God gave me and let them love me back. And I will praise God for the perfectly beautiful baby boy that He has given us. Oh, and I'll also grab a case of Dr. Pepper, of which I have not had a drop of since I found out I was expecting. Less than two weeks, sure... but DP is my main go-to!!
Please say a prayer for me tonight. I'd really appreciate it. :)
5 comments:
Oh my friend. You are close to my heart tonight, my heart breaks for you.... and I can't even imagine the emotions and frustration. Praying for you friend. Thanks for sharing, you share so beautifully.
I love you more than there are cases of DP in this universe, big sister. Not a minute goes by that I'm not thinking about you and all you've endured. We are praying non stop for answers, and peace of mind. Kiss that sweet boy of yours for me. Let us know what we can do.
Oh, Ryan... I hate this for you. I can't even imagine what that's like or what you're going through. Praying for you and for your doctors. HUGS.
Your story sounds so similar to mine. My heart hurts for you. I'm so sorry. No other words...
Thank you, Lindsey. As you well know, there are no words, you're right. I've read your blog a few times. I may soon be referencing your what not to say and what to say posts. Those were both spot on.
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